Posts Tagged minnesota
Wines With Architecture
Posted by Administrator in Art & Design, Food & Dining on May 11th, 2009
For many years, gourmets and wine connoisseurs have built reputations recommending which wines go with what foods, and many Americans have relished their acquired sophistication. But the Journal of American Rocket Science wants to carry this culture climbing to the next level.
Which wines are proper to consume with important architecture? When in Minneapolis, use this handy guide and impress your friends:
Target Tower on Nicollet Mall, Minneapolis
White Zinfandel. Both the wine and the architecture have a two-dimensional character.
Weisman Art Museum, U of M Campus, Minneapolis:
Merlot. Many well rounded tastes, bright finish.
Walker Art Center, Minneapolis:
Any wine you have never heard of before, so you won’t understand what you are tasting.
Quarry Shopping Center, Northeast Minneapolis:
Woodbind. Made from fermented sawdust recycled from Home Depot lumber sales department.
Hennepin Avenue Bridge, Minneapolis:
Burgundy. A few spikes of high flavor but short delivery to finish.
Minneapolis Art Institute Recent Expansions
Any cheap wine easy to digest.
Guthrie on the Riverfront
Off-dry champagne. Opened for a short time to produce low fizz.
Ivy Tower
Petite Syrah with Vodka chaser. Diminutive but distinct taste notes overwhelmed by strong indistinct sensations.
Minneapolis Historic Buildings
Claret. Decorous taste hints, interior tannins, reminiscences of tobacco, all not long lasting.
Thunderbird Hotel in Bloomington
Thunderbird.
I-35W Bridge
Two Buck Chuck, from Trader Joe’s. Mild and smooth, but not what you would die for.
Michele Bachmann Seeks New Image
Posted by Administrator in Local, Politics on April 30th, 2009
“I’m just a plain ordinary Minnesota farm girl at heart,” she exclaims.
Still under wraps, political makeover specialists are working to reverse some unfavorable perceptions of Michele Bachmann, U.S. House representative from Minnesota’s Sixth District, and the state’s most controversial politician. These handlers have chosen food as a basic component of everyday life, and butter seems most appropriate.
Soon, the iconic image of a cheerful Indian maiden holding a box of one of Minnesota’s most well known products will take on the congresswoman’s visage. A comprehensive marketing campaign will present her in an “I’m just a plain ordinary Minnesota farm girl at heart” character.
The Michele Bachmann Appointment Calendar
Posted by Administrator in Local, Politics on April 9th, 2009
Now – available from the Journal of American Rocket Science – the Michelle Bachmann Appointment Calendar for 2009 -2010
Now you can enjoy the words of Minnesota’s controversial Republican U.S. House
of Representative Michelle Bachmann, as she really spoke them in public.
And printed below – rebuttals by her ardent critics – all encapsulated in this
appointment calendar as produced by the Journal of American Rocket Science.
Order yours now – contact the Journal of American Rocket Science and get your
Michelle Bachmann Appointment Calendar!
Governor Pawlenty to Minnesota: “The future for this state is to become Mayberry RFD”
Posted by Administrator in Volume II on June 5th, 2007
Pointing out that the nation’s happier times has been no better reflected than in the 1960s TV program Mayberry RFD, Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty will soon announce in a prepared statement: “If you’ve watched my modus operandi in government, you’ll see I’m not starving the state’s economic development, education system and culture by cutting taxes – I’m preparing for our state’s future – we can become the next Mayberry RFD.”
“Life was simpler then, but our nation was also happier then,” the governor stated, “ So if we become simpler, we will be happier.”
Pawlenty pledged he will continue to strip away appeasement programs like health care, complicated education systems, and needless light rail and extra traffic lanes. Pawlenty sees his role as a governor taking on the image of Andy Griffith, who played Sheriff Andy Taylor who also acted as mayor, making everyday problems uncomplicated, without government intervention. Law and order can be simplified as well, and as a gesture to bipartisanship, Pawlenty will ask former Democratic U.S. Senator Mark Dayton to assume the role of always-nervous Deputy Barney Fife, as played on the TV sshow by Don Knotts.
Only one educational program will be needed, Pawlenty noted, “We’’ll get language classes in operation that will teach southern drawl as a second language.”
Critics of the governor who obtained advance copies of Pawlenty’s upcoming announcement complained that bringing back the state to Mayberry RFD times will mean no highly convenient ATM machines. Another issue will be the role of guns in this back-world. In the TV Mayberry, Sheriff Andy Taylor issued only one bullet to his deputy that he had to keep not in his gun but in a shirt pocket. The NRA will not be pleased.
