In mid-February 2014, Bob Roscoe and Doug Mack noticed an announcement for the Preserve Minneapolis’s February 2014 Breakfast With a Preservationist event somehow carried the 20014 date. So the pair pondered by e-mail what would be the issues in historic preservation and city planning 18,000 years from now – in 20014.
Here are their findings:
The Guthrie Theater will finally find its true calling and will be reused as an orbiting IKEA.
The Minneapolis Planning and Economic Development Department will re-define a “small area plan” to contain an entire solar system.
By 20014, Minneapolis downtown skyways will be converted into human transport tubes to whisk business people around the area in milliseconds.
20014 Historians will read 20th century copies of the Star Tribune, and with Sid Hartman’s large amount of copy space, assume Sid was a spiritual leader and obscured his wisdom with pseudo-inane commentary.
The U of M’s golden gopher will morph into a golden gopher robot.
At the Preserve Minneapolis’s 20014 Breakfast With a Preservationist event, the audience will probably have Soylent Green pastries served by robots.
Preserve Minneapolis will still call their Summer events Walking & Biking Tours—but conduct them with jetpacks and teleporting.
The Vikings will be asking for a new planet for their space-stadium.
Block E will still be empty and sad.
Most coffeehouses’ upper shelves of Monin syrups will be unchanged from 2001.
Saint Paul won’t have changed much.