Archive for November, 2011
Big Box Retailers to Petition U.S. Congress to Delete Thanksgiving and Create BIG BOX DAY
Posted by Administrator in Economy on November 23rd, 2011
Thanksgiving as we have known it since the days of the pilgrims may be a thing of the past, as the Big Box Retailers For a Better America (BBRBA) is organizing federal legislation to substitute a four-day big box holiday weekend, beginning with the third Thursday in November and ending in the final hours of the following Sunday night. “Americans should not have to endure excess unhealthy eating on this obsolete holiday,” remarked MMRBA spokesman Dan Dollar, ”when they can get an early start on celebrating Christmas.”
In the last few years, the big box stores have become fiercely competitive, moving store openings from 6AM the Friday after Thanksgiving to midnight and now into Thanksgiving evening itself, a move that seems only inevitable.
By next year, that traditional holiday song we have grown up with may be rewritten into: “Over the freeway and through the sound barrier walls to big boxes we go.”
Catholic Church Buys Crystal Cathedral – And Hopes to Buy Transparency
Posted by Administrator in Religion on November 20th, 2011
The sort-of-famous Chrystal Cathedral in Orange County, California, designed by noted architect Phillip Johnson and his partner John Burgee, has been sold to the Catholic Church for a reported $57.5 million. The stated reason for the purchase, according to the Orange County Catholic Diocese, is that the structure’s real estate price was too good to pass up.
But the Journal of American Rocket Science has discovered that a conclave of Catholic church hierarchy deliberated as to what to do about the constant criticism of lack of transparency. Finally, one prelate came up with a solution: the answer to lack of transparency is glass, a lot of it. When they learned of the Crystal Cathedral was up for sale, they acted with uncharacteristic quickness.
As one church spokesman commented: “That’s why we are called the Holy See.”
